Time with Tony

Just before the end of the 20th century, the movie “Sliding Doors”, starring Gwyneth Paltrow, came out, and I remember thinking it was a brilliant concept. “If X happened, then this series of events would occur, but if Y happened in that moment, then an entirely different series of events would unfold.” We’ve all had those sliding doors moments, and quite honestly, thinking about the what-ifs often stirs emotions that are probably best not dwelled on too long.  

But my sliding doors moment was not only life-changing, it was potentially life-saving. It was the summer of 2021, the middle of the pandemic, and a period of change and reflection in our household in Maryland. My daughter had just finished high school and was preparing to head to college in Ohio. A few months earlier, I had been a finalist for an administrative position at a school that felt like a great fit, and I genuinely believed I was a strong candidate. But I didn’t get the job. So there we were, spending the summer at home in Sandy Spring, enjoying the quiet campus without students around.

Around that same time, we’d received self-administered colon cancer screening kits in the mail from our insurance provider, Kaiser Permanente. We had no reason for concern, but Anne and I decided we might as well do them.  

About two days later, I got a call instructing me to schedule a colonoscopy after the test detected blood. I almost brushed it off. I was only 47, had no symptoms or concerns, but it seemed like a reasonable next step, especially since my maternal grandfather had had bowel cancer. I’ll never forget that day. I actually woke up during the procedure and could see an irregular image on the screen that the GI doctor was focused on. When I asked what it was, she seemed shocked I was awake and then said words I’ll never forget: “Anthony, this is concerning.”  

Everything moved incredibly fast after that. That night I had a CT scan, and soon afterward, surgery was scheduled to remove the growth along with a large section of my colon.

The surgery went smoothly for me, though Anne spent six anxious hours in a nearly empty hospital with no updates due to COVID protocols. Within days, we got the results: the surgery was successful, the tumor removed, but the lab confirmed Stage 3B colon cancer. That summer, I went from looking forward to the beach and rounds of golf to experiencing major surgery and beginning chemotherapy before the season was even over.  

In times like that, you fall back on clichés: “It changed my perspective.” “I have a deeper appreciation for what matters.” “Life is short so live it to the fullest because you never know when your time is up.” 

If you’re an NFL fan, you’ve likely noticed the October “Crucial Catch“ campaign. You may have seen me wearing my Commanders gear in support of it. This initiative can’t be promoted enough. If there’s one key lesson from my experience, it’s this: cancer does not discriminate. It doesn’t care about age, gender, diet, smoking or drinking habits, weight, or occupation. The truth is, if brilliant researchers can’t pinpoint the exact causes of cancer, none of us should dismiss the risks. The only proven defense is early detection. If you’ve made it this far, I implore you to think about your own screening schedule, and to remind older family members to get checked.

And my sliding doors moment? Had I been offered that admin position in April 2021, I would have accepted, and never come to know and love the community here at FSW. More significantly, I know in my heart that I wouldn’t have taken that initial cancer test that arrived in the mail. Had I waited until the recommended age of 50, it’s chilling to imagine what that growth might have become.

And I’m grateful to say this past August I got my 4 year-all clear from Zimmer Institute.